no dream story

Indian Ink on Paper - 297x240mm - 2020

This drawing was created for a charity show benefitting relief for the Australian bush fires that were raging from late 2019 to early 2020. Like a lot of people I was horrified by the destruction going happening at the time and I wanted to help. I donated some money to different animal charities but being out of work I couldn’t contribute as much as I would like.

An open invitation for a charity group show popped up in my Instagram as I was swiping through stories. I asked to be a part of it and was accepted and then forgot about it until a week before submissions were due. Well I didn’t completely forget, the exhibition was in the back of my mind, but I had the due date wrong in my head. Fortunately I double checked dates when I did, otherwise I would have completely missed it.

This being my first time as a part of a group show, I decided to draw an original piece. I hadn’t drawn with ink and brush in a very long time and I wanted to make my submission a bit more special than a print reproduction - although making a print of a previous drawing was my fall back plan in case I didn’t finish in time or the artwork turned out shit.

The drawing is based on the Greater Sooty Owl, due to the species being Australian, looking cool and owls are hella fun to draw. The drawing was completed within about 3-4 days and the whole experience was an absolute joy. It really reminded me of why I love using ink with brush, it was also the first time I used white gel pens to add some extra details and highlights to an ink drawing. So much fun.

On the day to deliver the drawing to the gallery I thought it would be a good opportunity to go for a driving lesson (at the age of 30 something I decided I would finally and slowly learn how to drive). Before driving I tried to quickly wash both my dog and a friend’s dog in the blazing sun, a very exhausting affair. I didn’t feel great when it came to driving and was generally a bit loopy. I instantly crashed into a car as I was coming out of my driveway. Fortunately no one was hurt and the people who I hit were really lovely about it all, their car only had a scratch along a side bullbar. The front car was a bit more mangled, and I was a shaking frazzled mess.

After the car crash I had to get an uber to the gallery because I was running quite late. Then on the day of the exhibition opening I also got an uber due to running late. The artwork didn’t sell. Then when it came time to pick up the unsold artwork I got another uber due to not having a normal sleeping pattern, not waking up to my alarm and running late.

I felt like such a piece of shit due to how much I spent on transportation involving an unsold drawing. I felt extra bad considering I had also caused damage to the front of my car during the crash. I would have been financially better off and would have done more good for charities if I just donated some extra money. It’s one of the few times a drawing experience has left me feeling sadder instead of happier. The sadness is more due to everything surrounding the drawing.

I tend to look at my drawings as markers of time periods in my life, I can generally remember hardships or joys I was going through during the time of creation. The drawing is currently hanging in my room and it’s a piece I’m rather keen to give away and forget about. But I’m probably better off keeping it around to remind me to get to bed earlier.